The Ark

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All Blog Posts (958)

Exhibit A hole Poodlephobe Rant and how to say F you.

So last night was the closing reception/gala/auction extraordinaire at the dog art exhibit.

I wore the big name tag and my sensible suicide shoes.

I was chatting with a local legendary lady big fish when this super soap opera hair wasp man came up to speak with her.

He said

"I'm so and so and I work for 'Financial Giant"

to which she replied

"Oh! My son in law's with 'Other Financial Giant'. That's just greeaaaat. This is the artist who painted all these… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 16, 2008 at 9:30am — 10 Comments

Two Years Vloggin'- Here's Why


10. It's a worthwhile hobby (creative, expressive, thought-provoking, a vehicle for putting your thoughts together, etc.)

9. People go, but new people come (if you extend yourself, you widen that circle of positive people and the assholes increasingly become irrelevant)

8. It broadens your paradigm (if you open yourself up to new perspectives- not just stick with your own)

7. It creates an ongoing record of who you were-… Continue

Added by SydTheSkeptic on November 14, 2008 at 9:46pm — 3 Comments

Subject Line Conga...

This started as a challenge by NobodysChild over at LV

Find the most bizarre random "subject Lines" and post them as your greatest hits!

Here are mine:

Ning Nong's not letting me in

Kill Him

my cockatoo plucks my mustache hairs

An invitation for your dog

Glorious Goddess of Light

dude, I found your book

Worlds Most Unlucky Woman Holds Title Strong

Holy Shitzu, Chiggums!

...checking to see if you…

Added by SydTheSkeptic on November 14, 2008 at 9:39pm — No Comments

Email Subject Lines

Nobodyschild99 has a fun exercise in her blog. To make a list of your top ten personal favorite email subject lines.
Here's mine:

1. Final Insult
2. Hermaphrodites - real or imaginary?
3. Scottish Dickies on the Phone
4. Iran, Scranton
5. The Trilobites Need Your Loving Ears
6. Eccentric Ass
7. Chode
8. Other Chode
9. Artistic Friends are Pussies
10. Hairdo Fact

This is fun, try it!

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:21am — 1 Comment

The Wilde Gang and the BLonde Bond

My parents were both teachers at the same school that we attended.

Since they worked for 1 extra hour after the students left, we required supervision. - Especially in our younger years.

The woman who took the Job "baby sitting" us teachers' kids after school was named Mrs. Wilde. Her husband worked for British Aerospace and she was a librarian/recess aide at the school.

She was attractive. She was vocal about her general dislike of children. (She and and Mr. Wilde… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:20am — No Comments

Umatic Japanaphobe

I recently read Surfcottage's blog which mentioned Richard Chamberlain

We had little media in Saudi Arabia. Movie Theaters were illegal. Television was broadcast from Bahrain for three hours a night. The last ten minutes of the "News" showed the King of Saudi being kissed by visiting dignitaries to Sousa marches. I was watching cartoons like "Felix the Cat" in the 1980s.

Most people there watched black market video tapes. Those were the days of VHS and Beta. My parents… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:18am — 1 Comment

Dreaming about Syd

So, LV users have infiltrated my active dream life.

I dreamt it was the opening reception of my art exhibit in October.

The gallery was fairly normal, although it was missing an exterior wall which was a grassy slope.

Syd's "job" at my show was to perform an amateur fireworks display.

She was lighting them in empty cans, then unsuccessfully lobbing them down the slope, but not far enough away - so she would run after them going "ooh ohh! Oh dear, uh… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:15am — No Comments

Waiting, Judging, Volunteerism

I've been waiting for a big job since April. Thought I would start this monday..Now they want drawings. I don't draw well. So I'm cooking and blogging today.

I was the county fair judge for childrens' painting the other day. It was my first time judging for this agricultural organization. They have their own language and system. I was intimidated by the paperwork and the fact that I would have to interview each child about their piece.

They decided to give me a high strung… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:10am — 1 Comment


First of all, an update about my dog. She's doing great on the meds! Her behavior is normal - except the lasik has made her wet her bed a few times. I will find out more on the 21st.

Today I had a rather rude, but true, comment on my video "Failure Smorgasbord".

The comment was:

U need a dental job.

I looked at the user's site and saw that he appears to be a Greek man, retired commercial airline pilot, who maybe lives in Papua New Guinea. He has 3… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:08am — No Comments

Sick Dog Sick People

I found out on wednesday that my Corgi (13) is very ill.

Her breath was rapid and labored and she would not eat.

Her symptoms revealed themselves while she was staying with my parents. (My father is recovering from Oral Cancer and finds pleasure in her company.)

She has an enlarged heart, fluid around her heart and lungs, and her lungs don't look right.

Everyone loves this dog.

I brought her home when I was nineteen years old; two days after I dropped out of… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:06am — 2 Comments

Children do not see color; they see Logos

I was four years old our first night out in Saudi.

We were walking down the streets of Al Khobar at night. I could not comprehend that we were in a foreign country, and I did not realize that the sea of Saudi, Pakistani, Philippino, and Yemeni men who crowded the streets were any different than at home. All I could figure was that we were at the county fair which made me anxious to see the rides and have a corn dog.

My mother bought a shish-kebob from a street vendor and… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:02am — No Comments

My Mother

I was raised in the Middle East. We traveled in summer.

We began and ended each summer in London.

My mother raised us with what she refers to as the "Socratic method". That is, she taught us by asking questions.

(She now regrets this method as she managed to raise two know-it-all-assholes who think their mother is stupid)

We were in Heathrow airport. my brother was 12 years old and I was 10. We were terrible, fighting with each other and giving her hell. We… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:00am — No Comments

Before 8 AM

Originally Posted at LV August 9 2008.

She died very peacefully and beautifully this morning.

It's hard to believe she's dead because she looks so beautiful.

I'll be offline.

This morning my goal was to call the vet at 8' o clock.

Mr. Flophouse rose early.

She made her way to his chair at the kitchen table, labored breath, wobbley.

He patted her head and she made her way back to her bed- a tremendous effort.

I rose at… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 7:00am — 1 Comment

My Brother

My brother is an accomplished Jazz musician.

His life is interesting.

I like musicians because they have to get around and work together.

Visual Artists (like me) are more or less domestic and don't have to play well with others.

I helped him move out of his apartment last week..I didn't take the TV or Microwave and a few other things because he said a needy friend was going to come by to get them.

I called my brother yesterday to ask how the rest of the move… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 6:58am — No Comments

Praying To Jesus on Saudia Airline

My first dog was a desert bred saluki pup who was abandoned by the pack.

We called him a saluki (as we called all feral desert dogs) but in hindsight he must have been a cross between a saluki and a Canaan dog. He had the sight hound body and hound ears. But he was much sturdier and his coat was flashy black and white.

Dad named him Spot.

It was rare to have a dog in Saudi. Salukis were the only acceptable breed. Dogs were not allowed to be shipped into the country… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 14, 2008 at 6:55am — No Comments

LV will not DIE

ian drusden
and a few other insane phuck heads went over to brad
and pulled a knife on him

so for now LVs back but brad may go al harakiri on us there is no garantee
pooor bastard never saw that andromeda crotch kick coming ::P:P:P:P:P

Added by jinboy on November 14, 2008 at 3:13am — 1 Comment

Don't be so sad!!!!

So LV is gone. We knew it was coming. We discussed it. We prepared for it.

Syd created it and we joined it :-)

Geez, folks...I mean, it's not like someone died, right? We have this place and a number of others where our friends are!! Let's keep this in perspective--it's not an earthquake, hurricane, tsunami or terrorist attack.

It's a different link we click now.

I know, I know....LV was important. It served a purpose. It was a community. We were part… Continue

Added by JustAnotherUserName on November 14, 2008 at 1:00am — 2 Comments

ARK member ONE HUNDRED, and The No-Longer-Temporary-ness of This Place

Steve is member #100.

I was thinkin', when I built the ARK, that we'd get maybe thirty, forty people tops. We not only have a hundred members now, but we got almost that many responding to a survey, which means people are not only signing up, but tuning in!

So here's the deal...gonna open this place up for anyone who wants to put their bags down. That basically means I take back what I said about it being temporary. Because even if LV does come back (by some slim chance),… Continue

Added by SydTheSkeptic on November 12, 2008 at 10:30pm — 9 Comments


Lately, I was BLOCKED/FILTERED to watch videos in LV, the reason: Our Local internet provider found LV to be lewd, too mature for their eyes, and dont know what else (only them knows) which I found so selfish and just plain bullsh*t! (sorry for cursing LOL). It made a big impact on me because you see i love to watch videos in LV, thats what I do when I have free time-watch, appreciate, comment, put hit votes, fave it and more of what you can do to a video. I was like down and out for days when… Continue

Added by ferdz ines on November 12, 2008 at 6:30pm — 2 Comments


I named him Doty; a country term he taught me for "Old, rotten wood".

He saved my life during adolescence by giving me a tyrannical reign over 40 acres of backwoods.

The move to the US was the worst time in my life.

Culture shock in a rural community - to date, the most painful time simply because I had no coping skills.

We built a cabin in the woods - it took us an entire Summer.

I announced to my mother that I had built a cabin with a 63 year old man near the… Continue

Added by flophousepoodle on November 10, 2008 at 5:09pm — 2 Comments

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