Sitting in the lobby of a cheap Holiday Inn. I want to leave.
Go back to New England or original England. Either way I don't care.
My instincts are telling me to get out now but in all honesty, they've been telling me this for a while.
In Manchester Airport I had to force myself to check in. More than once I fought back tears as I said goodbye. Those who know me know this is rare.
Arriving in the US airport I felt no excitement. Standing on a moving silver floor surrounded by glass I watched the people. Down below me on the left people took up three chairs as they slept in an almost empty lounge. On my right, disheveled, sweaty people sprinted by to make connections. And I stood still on my moving silver floor waiting to feel...well, anything really.
I've met up with my two new colleagues. We have nothing in common. Work-shy vs workaholic. Young vs old. Different senses of humour. The list goes on. They're not bad people we just have almost nothing in common.
So here I am sitting in the lobby of the Holiday Inn awaiting the arrival of my new boss and I'm trying to decide if I should tell him how I feel or head out to the new club and see how it goes. My instinct is telling me to tell him now. The longer I leave it the harder it will be to get out. On the the other hand without going out to the club to experience anything, I really have no reason to say I want to leave.
Trust my instincts?