Suzecue had an interesting comment in my last blog about my first boyfriend. I recently found out that he was in prison for 15 years for making meth.
"what is it about past loves doing jail time? I am sure that if we were still in their lives, they would have been law-abiding citizens. yea, right... "
It is kind of true isn't it? It is almost egotistical to believe that with just the power of our love we could save the people in our lives from making terrible mistakes. As if our love were an invisible shield that can protect them not only from outside forces but from their own demons.
I do believe in the power of love to heal and redeem. I believe that when our love is pure and unconditional we can move mountains, but love is rarely those things. In our lives, love is more often about expectations and ego then about meeting the needs of another person. According to the Bible (don't worry, I'm not going all holy roller, I am just going to quote a popular and almost secular verse on what love is).
1 Corinthians 13:4-13
4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
8Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. 9For we know in part and we prophesy in part, 10but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. 11When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. 12 Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
13And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.
If this is true, then love really should conquer all. I'm not talking about romantic love, I'm talking about the love of a friend, a brother/sister or parent. The deep abiding love that comes from a deep understanding of another. I believe that the greatest gift we can give a friend is unconditional love. Sometimes that means an open ear without recrimination, sometimes it means a shoulder to cry on. sometimes it just means letting someone know that they are important to you, important enough to live through the hard times together as well as the good times.
Maybe this is all it takes to make a difference in the life of a friend.
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