one thing leads to another and another and another

[lima]

people can change if they want to.

its not impossible.

but some people don't want you to change. you become a better person and they want to hold you to the person that they did not like before, they don't want you to become more positive, they want you to stay negative.

they want to hate the good...

people that get upset because YOU have changed your life for the better are not the people you need to be hanging around. They are only going to bring you down.
Why subject yourself to something/someone that does not make you feel good about yourself?

that makes no sense.

Its like dominos. negativity is contagious. When I had a bad experience, I found myself sharing it with up to perhaps ten people, yet when I have a positive experience, I seem to not tell as many people compared to the negative.

I am trying to break free from that habit and not speak at all about the negative. I don't want to continue to feed it. Even if I don't wanna have anything to do with it, acknowledging that its still there at times, still adds to the dilemma.

my own personal hell. I created it, now I need to do away with it.

I have also learned to let go... don't focus on what I can't change...

so yeah, we can't change the world by turning a blind eye to the negative in it, but if we are going to war with negative, we must select our battles wisely.


If you take yourself out of the equation, that one domino that continues the cycle of negativity, not only are you bettering yourself, but the world as well.



I guess what I am saying is, if you really wanna change, you will.

it's all up to you.

[Geoff]

Its like dominos. negativity is contagious. When I had a bad experience, I found myself sharing it with up to perhaps ten people, yet when I have a positive experience, I seem to not tell as many people compared to the negative.

I don't think sharing unhappy experiences necessarily is the same thing as spreading negativity. Troubles faced bravely or skillfully inspire other people. I imagine that some of the ten people you shared your hard times with felt honored by your trust.

But yes, let's hear about the good experiences too.

[JustAnotherUserName]

I agree with Geoff. Sometimes when we share negative experiences it's simply because we need support in order to deal with it. That's different than being a negative person or having a negative spin on life. Negative people stir shit, create drama and try to make other people unhappy. If you want to be a positive person, you have to do just that--put a positive spin on things. Even in the worst of circumstances, there is always something positive to take away. I like to think of myself as living proof of that.

[NatureJunkie]

I agree with Geoff and Ruth that sharing negative experiences isn't necessarily a negative thing. But I also agree with you that negativity is contagious. I have worked in environments where one bitter person changed the whole atmosphere of the place--for the worse, of course. Negativity can practically generate its own weather. Stepping away and ignoring it may not alter its impact on others, but it stops the impact it's having on you and, like you say, you can choose not to be a domino.

Great video you chose for illustration, by the way.

[Chig]

I think sometimes there are points in life where it is good to let the positivity drown out negativity..... you know until the cat comes in and messes up all your nicely laid dominoes.
And it can be contagious. :-)

[Holger]

Your plans sound very good, Lima!

"don't focus on what I can't change..."
It's an old stoic widsom to focus your efforts on things you can change and not waste it on things you have no effect on.

Negativity is contagious and positivity is contagious. That's part of the human condition, to be easily influenced by other humans.

I don't think with negativity you meant to share personal problems with friends as the other commenters assumed.