The Ark

Whatever floats your boat...

Don't read if your easily disgusted. How I prepare for a date

1) Get a hair cut
2) Take a dump
3) take a shower and loofah my whole body
4) shave very closely
5) Brush, floss about three times
6) put on deodorant
7) take another dump. It's hard to be on a date when you need to fart.
8) put on very small amount of Cologne
9) whack off. You can not do this to early because you may reboot. It is the best prevention for blue balls, and you will not be a horny, puppy dog, tool. There is nothing better to turn a girl on than not drooling all over them.
10) carry a few new condoms. can't trust the old ones, and it's prudent to take more than one because you might have trouble getting it on. You also might not choose to bolt, and never call her again.

Views: 7

Comment by jinboy on March 12, 2009 at 3:05am
teachings from the master
i have much to learn :P:P:P
Comment by Pypermarru1 on March 13, 2009 at 10:20am
#6 is crucial. Man sweat is only sexy in romance novels never in real life. Just try'n to help my straigh sistas ;0)
Comment by Kat.Ballou on March 26, 2009 at 1:08pm
you're late quit whacking off


You need to be a member of The Ark to add comments!

Join The Ark

© 2021   Created by Chig.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service