Mold, Turtles, & Suicide

Comment by NatureJunkie on December 15, 2010 at 12:47am

It sounds like she's in that stage called "the suicide trance," i.e. she's too depressed to feel very much. She's not just thinking about it, she's made her decision and she's made a plan. And while she's waiting for the time, her life consists of going through the motions of routine. Since she has no family or close friends, there's no one you could really alert, is there? No way to intervene.

 

I don't know what to suggest. Having been so closely touched by suicide yourself, I'm sure you know much more about it than I do. I just feel for the bind she put you in. If an acquaintance in her state of mind came to me with that confession, I wouldn't know how to give help.

Comment by NatureJunkie on December 15, 2010 at 12:50am

P.S. To clarify my last line, if it were a friend or a family member, I would have a clue about what to do. But someone who's more or less a stranger? That's a tough one.

Comment by SydTheSkeptic on December 15, 2010 at 1:03am

NJ- The whole thing's actually making me more mindful about a number of things, on a daily basis too.  There's nothing I can do, really, except be compassionate, kind, patient, and non-judgmental toward my neighbor.  That last one I'll really have to work on. 

Comment by photo2010 on December 15, 2010 at 3:20am

Syd, This vlog touched a deep fear of mine. Having a disability kind of puts one in the frame of

mind that your neighbor is in. HOWEVER, I never thought that way until my health started to

go down, (from contact with mold in my opinion, but that  tale is for another time). I saw how my

Mother was treated in nursing homes, and one of the nurses even said to me: "why are you so

concerned about your Mother, she's old, don't worry about it", that's some SCARY S***!

Anyway, I think your neighbor needs counseling, but part of me says this is her life and her right

to live it or not live it. Just thought of a movie on this subject, ''Night Mother' I believe it was called.

One last thought, I have heard that when someone reveals this kind of thing to someone else, it is

really a cry for help more than a desire to end it. Heavy vlog.

Comment by SydTheSkeptic on December 15, 2010 at 8:18am

Kevin, a cry for help.  That's what I thought almost immediately but then everything that came after told me she believed this was perfectly okay and even normal. 

 

So now I stop by when I come home from work under the pretense of mail delivery.  Don't really know what else I can do, though.

 

I hear ya about the nursing home stuff, and I know you've had a lot happen with home healthcare people taking advantage and even threatening you guys, so the fears are understandable.

Comment by LtAdams2247 on December 15, 2010 at 8:18am

OK, I admit the Adams to English translation isn't always an easy one, I'm sorry ;-)

I actually made you a compliment. Let me decypher. While I mostly find vlogs shallow, superficial, inconsequential and thusly an utter waste of my time (there's no denying that ;-) ), YOU when you find it in you to go down that dark road can provide profoundness and wisdom that I want to hear. Well I don't know if it's wisdom or profound thoughts or whatever the hell is going on. But a connection happens which must be the reason that after all this time both you and I are still here. I am sorry I am unable to respond to the fun with iphone topics like most people. Don't be afraid to go dark, cause strangely enough, I can only see you in the darkness.

 

Plus, when a selfcentered, isolationist mofo like myself who lives by the strict "fuck off" code of conduct choses to listen, that should be compliment enough ;-)

Comment by SydTheSkeptic on December 15, 2010 at 8:28am

Peter, I totally get what you're sayin' here.  I'm not afraid of the dark at all, although I find that I stop myself from going there because I always think it'll be a downer for others and I don't want to be that. 

On the other hand, that's been the difference between what I used to do on here and what I do now, and that could be the reason I haven't felt that it's as fulfilling as it once was...

 

K, ya made me think, ,damn it. It's too early in the morning here for that. 

Need. more. coffee.

 

P.S. Will definitely go back down that road again.

Comment by photo2010 on December 16, 2010 at 1:29am

Syd, I've done some research on this, and even the highest rated nursing home in my area has been cited for hiring people without doing background checks. I hope I never have to go that route. I can't disagree with your neighbor on that point. Yet I wonder if she is suffering from depression and couldn't get some help if that is the case. I praise you for what you are doing for her. :)

Comment by Geoff on December 16, 2010 at 10:53am

I think just throwing it out there was a smart move on your part. It really isn't possible from this great pixelated distance for me to guess whether your neighbor's admission was a cry for help or just a random eruption from an isolated consciousness--or if she is deep down serious.

 

But the disturbing intention she shared is now a piece of your life and consciousness. You certainly don't owe it to her to treat it as a secret. It may be that somebody who hears you will have something interesting and useful to say to you. I deal with a disturbed neighbor regularly and there are fine balances to be calculated all the time.

Comment by BlancheNoE on December 18, 2010 at 10:27am

She (neighbor) *did* consider what it meant to you,...that's what she was fishing for. Passive-agressive, just can't abide that,...at all. I like Spacemonkey's idea.

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