Fear & Self-Loathing

Comment by Pypermarru1 on December 19, 2010 at 11:26am

When you say private video do you mean you made it for yourself to reflect on later or private to another vlogger but you never posted to them?

Anyway, I get what you are saying but I've always thought I do the opposite.  I tend to be critical of others on things they lack that I have - Not because I think I'm the shit, but because I think if I can achieve it why can't everyone.  I'm simplifying the concept for time of course. 

 

As for acting on feelings of compassion and the overwhelming kind of universal need - That is an interesting thing.  In my life, I’ve come across three types of people in this regard.

The first is the person that takes time and acts on things they care about - actively volunteer, give and participate on things they want to make changes in.  They like the way it makes them feel but they are more concerned about impacting the world they live in.  They make a concerted effort.  They make time.

The second is the "look at me” giving, volunteering and participating.  They care about what they are giving time and money too but it more about how that makes them looks to others.  How they are perceived for their contributions.

The third is the ‘talker’.  The talker does just that, talks.  They talk about the state of the world, situation, issue...Etc.  They feel a great deal of compassion and when you speak to them they are very energized and enthusiastic, but that is the extent of their abilities.  Their desire is not transformed into action.  These people only talk

What are the motivations? I’m opinionated so you know I have theories, but I think that would be way to much writing – I wouldn’t want to put ya through it…ha.

Don’t get me wrong, I know that everyone is a little snowflake and all that crap - and individuals can swing briefly from one type to another.  I just noticed these types of people whose reasons can be numerous.

 

Anyway, interesting video.  I just happen to be in the mood for some good conversation.  Good thing I'm meeting a friend for lunch.  lucky for me, not her....lol

Comment by SydTheSkeptic on December 19, 2010 at 12:07pm

I'm pretty sure I made it to upload onto VH awhile ago but I probably didn't because it was originally way too long.  It was in my trash bin (been cleaning out files) and then VH-ers started talking about willful ignorance, so I got lazy and instead of turning the cam on, I clipped the first half of this one down to a few minutes.

 

I do have lots of private vids, though; family and friends, an extension of my journal, art therapy vids, and lots like this one- where I made it to upload but never did.

 

I have little doubt your giving types exist, Pyper (I see all three in people I know, and myself, too).  I can think of a fourth, though.  Your types only address charitable "giving" but not so much "living".

 

Some people are motivated to completely give their lives over to a service of some kind (or almost completely), whether that means joining the military, the clergy, a political activist, an artist, or as a civil servant.

 

What I was addressing in the vid was more of a possible chasm between our desire to help and our ability to, whether that's real or perceived.  Whatever the reasons or motivations for acting or not acting, there's- I believe, some explanation there for why people judge others so quickly for NOT acting or for NOT giving or for NOT even understanding the bigger picture when it comes to how others are suffering while they're leading privileged lives.  I'm not apologizing for those who are willfully ignorant, I'm just saying that people are sometimes sanctimonious in their words toward those who are.   No one's a saint.

 

Those who can help and have the resources and capacity to do so probably don't because it's not a part of their value system.  They're more about survival of the fittest- a social Darwinian view.  Imho, it's not that they lack the capacity for compassion, they simply don't see the less fortunate on the same level in terms of humanity.  That's a whole other vlog, obviously.

Comment by LtAdams2247 on December 19, 2010 at 2:32pm

Well the feeling of powerlessness comes from seeing solutions for problems that can only be achieved at a large scale where as our range of influence doesn't leave our microcosm. You see the world burn and all you can do about it is what? Start a petition? Vote for the other guy who does the same things anyway? We'll have to settle for helping our old neighbour take out the trash or letting people go first in traffic. The world still burns and it's depressing like a mofo. I worked long and hard for my numbness, thank you very much ;-)

Comment by photo2010 on December 19, 2010 at 5:25pm

I don't know if this fits, but maybe as an extreme example. In the last ten years or so, Bill Gates started giving money to charities. One is specifically to help fight the epidemic of malaria in Africa. This is a laudible cause and effort. I have heard that Gates' Father convinced him to start giving his money to charity. It just didn't seem

like something Bill Gates would come up with himself after years of trying eat up competitors. Regardless of that, he has the resources and is using them to help now.

 

Syd, you state:  "Those who can help and have the resources and capacity to do so probably don't because it's not a part of their value system.  They're more about survival of the fittest- a social Darwinian view.  Imho, it's not that they lack the capacity for compassion, they simply don't see the less fortunate on the same level in terms of humanity."  This is right on imho. I know people who have more resources than they will ever need, (assuming they don't eat diamonds in their rice krispies). Yet, as far as I can tell, they do next to nothing to help those in need. In one case it is sad to see because it was the result of a friends parents having been in concentration camps and surviving, coming to the U.S. and working hard, becoming successful, but living as though everything could be taken away tomorrow.

 

I guess what I'm saying is, there is sometimes a bigger picture than what we are often presented with, for the reasons people have the capacity for compassion or not, and we should look deeper before we judge.

Comment by BlancheNoE on December 20, 2010 at 11:00am

When I was at LV and I had a couple of hater/stalkers, I sent them private messages trying to point out what you are saying in this vlog. When you come across someone on the web that just irks you, chances are they are displaying some behavior that reminds you of yourself in some way. Maybe it is something that you worked on and shed, or maybe it's something you still need to change but haven't been willing to see in yourself yet.

,..but yeah,...we are always quick condemn in others that which we refuse to acknowledge in ourselves.

Comment by SydTheSkeptic on December 20, 2010 at 1:21pm

Pete-I so hear ya on the powerlessness thing.  That's why they say politics begins, really, at a local level, but I keep wondering HOW long will it take for people to rise up against the robber barons this time around when they've slowly dismantled any way for us to really act in a collective and meaningful way.

 

I mean, we finally have a global tool of communication and we STILL can't organize against those whose interests wrest on the backs of the common human who are finding it harder and harder just to find and access resources they depend on for basic survival needs (like water, access to medical care, safety for their families, etc.)  We are fools, all, if we can't figure this out, or see how they've kept us inebriated and anesthetized by certain elements of our culture...

 

Anyway, see what you started...?

 

Kevin- What I wrote to Peter ^^^^  is totally what I think we're both referring to here.  Social darwinism (survival of the fittest) and the fact that certain members of our society believe they're somehow better humans than the poorer, struggling massess...this is the stuff that will lead humanity, imho, toward its own destruction, because those kinds of beliefs, on a large scale, cause humans to not care so much about the fate of global populations.  They don't see how we're all tied together because, well...they're not made of the same stuff.

 

Amy- Wow, you gave a lot of time and care to your haters.  I'd just respond "I love you" and there were two instances where that lead to meaningful exchanges with them.  In retrospect, I think it might've spurred on some stalker-like stuff with a couple of others, but your method for dealing with them is much more compassionate.  Did any of them respond in a way that gave you the impression your words met their mark?

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