MrPoe and Lessons from my Dad

[Dunleavy]

I understand that not all of you on The Ark like MrPoe. If you don't know him, then you might not get his twisted sense of humor at times. Believe me, he used to be worse. When we first began dating, he used to get really mad at himself over things which I thought were kind of stupid. I could actually feel the anger coming out of him. It was like this heavy sense of gloominess just emanated from his being or something. Being that I suffer from depression (that might surprise some of you), it would just drag me down. I learned early on that I couldn't be around him when he became like that.

I believe happiness is a choice for the most part. You can wallow in self-pity and be miserable or you can choose to do something about it. I learned that from my Dad. And I believe it. It doesn't matter what we do in this life, it's all in our attitude. We could be a garbage collector, sell insurance, work in a bakery, be a dispatcher...it doesn't matter. It's our attitude toward doing whatever we do that matters.

Last week was a difficult week for me. It would have been my Dad's 85th birthday. He passed away in June 2006 and I still miss him. To make matters more emotional, the Pittsburgh Steelers played in the Super Bowl and won over the weekend. This was his favorite football team and everyone in the family learned early on that if you rooted for someone against the Steelers, you would have to suffer through the "Silence of Dad" until he chose to forgive you for that blunder. Like when I turned 18 and he kept nagging me to register to vote. "Don't forget to register Republican," he would say. Well I registered all right, but not Republican like he informed me to. I think the silence lasted about a week. He would look at me and say, "I can't believe you" and then just stop talking.

So when I got home from work and after seeing a friend, I watched part of the game. I sat on the edge of my seat and groaned when Arizona got their touchdown with I think about 3 minutes remaining. I thought it was over and was so disappointed. Then I screamed and jumped up (scaring the beagle off the couch) when the Mighty Steelers scored. The beagle proceeded to bark at me telling me off for frightening her. When the game was over and the Steelers were Super Bowl champions, I was bawling. I could feel my Dad's presence and pleasure over the win. Lucy was freaked out I think over my behavior. She didn't know whether she should bark or try to lick my face so she did both and then insisted on me holding her.

Yes, it was an emotional week last week. I can even say I was a little stressed over letting people know it was MrPoe's birthday. He really does become Mr Gloom and Doom around his birthday. But he wasn't like that this year. I think it's the first year he hasn't been. He was even sick and it didn't bother him that I had told people. I'd like to think that's a little of me rubbing off on him, but I can't take credit for it.

So on to this week. I feel very disappointed right now. Disappointed in people in general and even more so in myself. I have been with MrPoe for twelve and a half years now and I can say I know him pretty well. So when I see a website (with a couple members here on The Ark) saying crap about him hating women, threatening women and using a photo I took of him calling him a "Fucktard," well that disappoints me and hurts my feelings. I guess I should thank you for cutting me out of the photo before you posted it, but I won't. Because when you attack him, you attack me. I know it's been going on for awhile and I've ignored it. I'm sure I don't know the worst of it, but when you take a photo I took of the man I love, well that's just wrong. Now I've been brought into it. I've read the crap that was written and attributed to him and it hurts. You don't know him. And you make fun of him because he is fat and tell him he'd be better off dead. Well you know what, I'm fat too so does that mean I'd be better off dead?

And as for him hating women and possibly being gay? Let me be the first to say that isn't the case. I wouldn't be with him if he was. I wouldn't be with anyone who wasn't a decent person. You know what I'm talking about, but it's obvious to me you don't care. I know you aren't stupid so that means you're choosing to mislead others because of your hatred.

I wish everyone involved would just grow up and let it go. Let go of the anger and drop it. And I've told MrPoe the same thing. I don't like it when he pokes fun of anyone. But sometimes ignoring it doesn't make it any better. And that's where I feel disappointed in myself. Not because I've let it bother me, but because I want to delete every photo I've ever posted, every blog I've ever written and every video I've ever made. I don't want to hear or read the crap you say about MrPoe because he is a decent human being. Nothing you say will ever change my mind because I know him and you don't. So I'm staying. And it might just be the time for me to stop looking the other way.

[Dunleavy]

Don't ever change Hatter. I appreciate the encouragement. I probably should continue ignoring them but like I said, it was a rough, emotional week. And my Dad also taught me to fight for what I think is right. That also goes for defending people against pond scum. You're one of the good ones. And to quote someone we know...."You're wonderful!"

[Pypermarru1]

Sorry to hear about your dad. The smallest things can trigger a memory and make a persons heart sink.
I am just getting to learn about Mr.Poe. I can tell he is smartass.....I like it. (so far)ha.
Be well Dunleavy ;)

[Dunleavy]

@Pypermarru1: Thanks Pyper.

[NatureJunkie]

Unfortunately when we play on these social-networking playgrounds, we lay ourselves open and make ourselves mighty vulnerable to mean-spirited jerks. But Deborah is right, they are far outnumbered by the good people to be found. Just give those jerks "The Silence of Dad."